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GLC Engrish So Good

Posted by Simon Templar On Monday, May 23, 2011

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

Author's note:

Subsequent to the posting of this article, some readers have highlighted via the Comments Column that the site I was directed to is not TM's official site. I've checked further on that - and that's true. The site is an agent's site. Or may be a scam site. But they don't ask for credit card details... Phew!

I also found out that ".co" is the internet country code for Colombia. ".co" is offered on some sites as the suffix for free site hosting.

My most sincere apologies to TM for whacking them. Kekeke... I'll make it up to TM by subscribing to UniFi when it reaches my area.

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

How important is the English language today?

In Malaysia, this is a very sensitive question. All sorts of people will throw in all sorts of argument regardless of if it's an 'aye' for English or 'nay' for it. And it will not take too long for that simple question to deviate to racial issues, then to religion, then to social contract, then to 'you are a pendatang', then to 'please respect the Constitution', then to 'BN is corrupt' and what is and what not.

The Malays are divided on this question. So are the Chinese and the Indians. The urbanites are divided on this question. There is not going to be a simple answer - that's for sure.

To me, the English language is so-damn-blardie-kau important. Hey, that's my stand so no need to tell me yours. Am not going to defend my stand now because am writing to show something else.

English is a complicated language. No kidding it is. We Malaysians are used to the rojak version so most of us could not be bothered to improve ourselves. Besides, asalkan we can understand each another, cukup makan lah... So, that's us in our daily lives. Fine and dandy. But on official documents, official events, good to be proper a bit lah. And on GLC websites, please put in a bit of effort lah. It reflects badly on the GLC, the government and we Malaysians as a whole.

I was trying to get a Unifi subscription for my house. Apparently I get to register online. Googled it and this is what greeted me:

What the...?

"Great News!!"

Dude, what's with the double exclamation marks? Why 2? Why not 3 or 5 or 10? Satu cukup bro. Where did you learn to use 2 anyway?? See, isn't it weird when I use 2 question marks? Cikgu kat sekolah tak ajar such things anymore?

"All Streamyx user is allow to Upgrade to UniFi services, except previously Streamyx user who have Sign Free Notebook and PC bundle package is no allow to upgrade to UniFi

Now you can Upgrade your Streamyx to UniFi or Apply new installation through this web site."

I don't even know where to start on these sentences. The basic grammar is bertaburan, capital alphabet is used in the middle of the sentence, the sentences are just rubbish... Seriously, this is embarrassing. This is supposed to be a big corporation in the country. This website is meant to reach out to a lot of people. Is this the work of the Google Translate? You can't blame me for raising this question. We have precedents in the Teoh Beng Hock case and more recently the super large banner in Mandarin greeting Wen Jiabao when he visited us.

Wait! The nightmare does not end there. After I submitted my registration...

"Thanks for your registration! Your form have been submitted! We will contact you as soon as possible. Please check for the Installation Guide Video page so that you can more understand on the UniFi installation Process before the contractor come to install the UniFi Services for you.

For those applicants haven't upload photocopy IC during registration, you can use you Scanner or Phone Camera or Digital Camera to take your photocopy IC (both side) and email to within 24 Hours. All the order will no be process until applicant IC have been received, If you have any enquiry or question, please don't hesitate to contact us at 010-7985600."

Aiyoh... Painful, painful... This is not an Email between 2 friends la! On your Personal Term, nobody gives a damn! This is you reaching out to your Customers. And for crying out loud, this is not something some less-than-capable chap Emailed me on the spot!! The above are all programmed Webpages. Why can't somebody check on this before it goes live?? Is this done in-house by UniFi? If yes, isn't there proper Monitoring and Hierachy for approvals? If no, which means that it is Outsourced, doesn't anyone perform any check? Or is everyone involved just too Lazy?? It can't be everyone involved being Equally incompetent in the English Language!! Someone somewhere must have been able to Pick Up at least some of the Gibberish. (Ok... Ok... Sorry about the punctuation marks, question marks and caps... Am trying to proof a point. So darn irritating isn't it?)

The attitude people, the attitude. The couldn't care less attitude which is as bad as corruption, if you asked me. I have no idea what the majority of government and GLC officers are paid to do. I don't need to elaborate as we already know their ineptitude pretty well. If you don't then you should not call yourself a Malaysian. Where have you been all these while?

Shy lah when you see these things. It is not that my English is any fantastic. I've got some serious grammar issues too - I admit to that. But you've just got to know when proper sentences need to be formed. Look at the context of which the language is being used. It is bad enough with people like me rojak-ing the English language on blogs like this. Not a good practice but I guess this is still somewhat acceptable as this is quite informal. But not on proper websites la. Have not checked Petronas' website but I will be horrified if they are this bad. (Maybe Tun does a personal inspection since he is so hands-on).

You know those emails you get on out-of-this-world English used on signboards, restaurants, toilets etc. Those where the pictures are probably taken from China or some East European countries. Time to stop laughing at these emails people. Malaysia is right down there with them.

Oh! This sms just came in on my handphone:

Good day 2u, Xxx! UniFi Services haven't cover Xxx Xxx yet! When UniFi ready in your area, UniFi installer automatic cal you for installation! Thanks

More punctuation marks. More grammatical errors. Different mode of communication, same rubbish. Then this is no longer the web master's issue, this is a corporation issue.

By the way, they told me my area already got service one loh! Or else I bodoh-bodoh go register for what? I am not government or GLC officer who got a lot of time in hand ok.

19 Response to "GLC Engrish So Good"

  1. Anonymous Said,

    They think they know best mah, and the govt agree with them cos don't want to lose their votes lor...

    So Malaysia speak like this kind of England laar...

    All the half-past-six good-for-nothing useless unemployables living under their tempurung...


  2. Anonymous Said,



  3. Anonymous Said,

    Satu Lagi Projek Barisan Nasional!!


  4. Anonymous Said,

    As what the BN ministers like to say, "malaysia is a unique country, cannot anyhow apply international standards". So, I supposed this is another malaysia standard that is now the norm and fully acceptable (free speech mah!). Anyone, don't like it, can leave the country loh, don't bising bising here.

    Another of their "SOP".


  5. Anonymous Said,

    Not trying to defend TM or anything, but I suspect that's not the official website. Especially since the unifi contact number is a 1-300 number, not a 010 number. And the online sign up includes an address search to ensure your area is covered. You've probably got an agent's site that's masquerading as TM.

    Or they could be that bad.


  6. Anonymous Said,

    dude ... I'm not a fan of TM either. However, upon investigating your claims, I've realised that the site that you were visiting has the following address whereas the official site from TM is located at ('' indicates that the company that owns the website is of Colombian origin whereas '.my' indicates that the company that owns the website is of Malaysian origin).


  7. Pentilium5 Said,

    This comment has been removed by the author.


  8. Pentilium5 Said,

    agree with anon up there, TM would never get you to scan your IC to them.... can be used for credit forgery if you know what i mean,


  9. Yong Said,

    woah, bro, looks like you have accidentally uncovered a scam website!


  10. Anonymous Said,

    "010" prefix? Who uses those anymore? Didn't those die with the 1990's Celcom?


  11. Anonymous Said,

    Even a half-decent scammer would have better English than these guys...


  12. Anonymous Said,

    So typical - "whack" first, think later. D'oh...


  13. Anonymous Said,

    Hey dude. Get your info right before start condemning anything in your blog. I believe the web that u browse is not the actual unifi website. Or maybe agent's website. The govmt and glc is planning something good for the country but it is someone like 'you' who like to 'makan atas angin' (take advantage / make profit from someone else's hardwork) and leave the shit to govt to settle it when things getting ugly. Dare to accecpt this comment?


  14. TM Sucks Said,

    If that is what we can expect from TM, maybe soon, we will have more interesting copy from Petronas, Maybank, POS Malaysia.

    anyway..there is no such domain of maybe another typo!


  15. Anonymous Said,

    As you rightly said, it is attitude, attitude, attitude. They will make the same mistakes in bahasa. The malady started a long time ago.


  16. To Anonymous 02:44, Anonymous 03:59, Pentilium 5,

    You guys are right! See my post-publish comment at the top of the article.

    Thanks guys...

    To Anonymous 11:38 - This is a non-profit site. We don't have any form of advertising here. So, what do you mean by "take advantage / make profit from someone else's hardwork"? What are you trying to get at?

    Simon Templar


  17. Anonymous Said,

    Guess this is not an official site of TM.
    As you can see it was made by the agent.
    Being a good citizen, perhaps you could call him and assist him on the grammar.
    He is just cari makan...


  18. Anonymous Said,

    Mynglish ?


  19. Anonymous Said,

    already stated there - Why Register Online with Us (AUTHORISED SALES AGENT)? so this guy must be TM agent not official TM website.


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